Killing George
Saving Princess Chloe
Saving Samantha
Killing Samantha
The Return of the John
Saving John
Saving Princess Chloe II
Killing Shaun
November, a Few Months Later...
Winter, Circa 1 Year Later
2021; 7 Years Later
2022; 1 Year Later
A Couple of Months Later
3 Months Later
3 Months Later
4 Months Later
Princess
Chloe
Married Prince George
Became Princess Chloe
Gave Birth to Quinn
Swapped Quinn for Guy Goma
Devastated at Losing Prince George
Dumped Guy Goma at the Palace
Fell in Love with Shaun
Princess
Chloe
Kidnapped
(The Dark Lord)
Rescued by Shaun and Ryan
Reunited With Her Shaun
Princess
Chloe
Stayed at Home the Whole Time
Princess
Chloe
Flew to Moscow, Russia with Shaun
Went to Putin's Funeral
Went Shopping at Glavnyi Universalnyi Magazin
Met Samantha
Death by Gun
(Samantha)
Princess
Chloe
Revived by The Hooded Woman
Reunited with Shaun
Fought with Everyone
Accidentally Stabbed Charlotte in the Skull
Princess
Chloe
Moved in with Shaun
New Quest
(Save John)
Set Off on the Journey to School
Attacked by Aliya Mustafina and Samantha
Kidnapped
(Samantha and Aliya)
Princess
Chloe
Travelled to Bideford with Aliya and Samantha
Kidnapped
(John and Noo-Noo)
Taken to the Gnome Reserve by John and Noo-Noo
Attended Her and John's Wedding
Rescued by Shaun
Discovered Shaun had Cheated on her with Sophie
Princess
Chloe
Moved in with Samantha and Aliya

Prince
George
Married Chloe
Death by Minibus
(Shaun)
Samantha
Met Chris on the Bus to Bideford
Kidnapped
(The Dark Lord)
Gassed by Mr Ayre
Saved by Kaye
Samantha
Married Gordon Brown
Gave Birth to Tony and Phil
Abandoned by Gordon Brown for Aliya Mustafina
Met Shrek
Did Unspeakable Things with Shrek
New Quest
(Murder Gordon and Aliya)
Flew to Moscow, Russia
Met Princess Chloe
Shot and Killed Princess Chloe
Called Shrek to Moscow
Repeatedly Shot The Dark Lord
Fell in Love with Aliya Mustafina
Engaged to Aliya Mustafina
Moved to St Petersburg
Samantha
Abandoned her Children Tony and Phil
Saw John, Faye, Felicity and Noo-Noo
Flew to China
Explained to Aliya that John and Co Were After Her
Fought with Everyone
Knocked out by John's Parabola
Carried out by Aliya Mustafina
Samantha
Fled to Greenland with Aliya Mustafina
New Quest
(Kill Shaun)
Flew to the School
Attacked Chloe
Kidnapped Chloe
Samantha
Told Chloe they plan to use her as bait to kidnap John
Travelled to Bideford to Kidnap John
Joined the Quest to Save Princess Chloe
Met Tinky Winky
Arrived at the Gnome Reserve
Attacked by Gnomes
Samantha
Death by Fire?
(Noo-Noo)

Shaun
Plotted Revenge Against Chloe and Prince George
Stole Skern Lodge's Minibus
Killed Prince George
Flew on Tango to be with Chloe
Declared his Love for Chloe
Shaun
Began the Walk to School with Ryan
Met a Young Squire Named John
New Quest
(Save Princess Chloe)
Hid From Dean and James, Servants of The Dark Lord
Met Quinn in the Gutter
Arrived at Kinglsey
Rescued Kaye
Fought with Brewborg and Slew Him
Attacked by Quintesentially Quinn
Slew Quintessentially Quinn
Found Princess Chloe
Fought The Dark Lord
Killed The Dark Lord
Rescued Princess Chloe
Reunited with His Princess Chloe
Shaun
Became Sir Francis
New Quest
(Save Samantha)
Arrived at the School
Met Mr Ayre
Attacked by Denis
Slew Denis
Gassed by Mr Ayre
Saved by Kaye
Death by Gas
(Mr Ayre)
Resuscitated by Samantha
Shaun
Became Deputy Prime Minister of the UK
Flew to Moscow, Russia with Princess Chloe
Went to Putin's Funeral
Went to a Meeting at the British Embassy
Devastated at the Loss of Princess Chloe
New Quest
(Kill Samantha)
Saw Samantha and Shrek
Death by Gun
(The Dark Lord)
Shaun
Revived by The Hooded Woman
Reunited with Princess Chloe
Fought with Everyone
Roasted Faye in the Oven
Shaun
New Quest
(Save John)
Set Off on the Journey to School
Chopped Dr Butt in Half
Attacked by Mr Gray
Shaun
New Quest
(Save Princess Chloe)
Caught John and Noo-Noo Fighting and Told Them Off
Received a Text From Sophie and went to Meet her
Declared his Love for Sophie
Met Tinky Winky
Arrived at the Gnome Reserve
Attacked by Gnomes
Ripped Noo-Noo's Sucker Off
Rescued Princess Chloe
Discovered Sophie was Pregnant
Shaun
Moved in with Sophie

Shaun's Cat
Tango
Beaten by Shaun with a Baseball Bat
Flew Shaun to be with Chloe
Shaun's Cat
Tango
Devoured Dean and James
Shaun's Cat
Tango
Shaun's Cat
Tango
Swore at Samantha for No Reason
Moved to St Petersburg
Shaun's Cat
Tango
Enjoyed Watching John and Faye
Fought with Everyone
Death by Grenade
(Selfless Act)
Shaun's Cat
Tango
Shaun's Cat
Tango
Shaun's Cat
Tango

Quintessentially
Quinn
Born to Princess Chloe and Prince George
Swapped by Princess Chloe for Guy Goma
Quintessentially
Quinn
Somehow Became Middle-Aged...
Beaten by Supporters of The Dark Lord
Rescued by Shaun, Ryan and John
Became Quintessentially Quinn
Attacked Shaun, Ryan and John
Mortally Wounded John
Death by Sword
(Shaun)
Mr Ayre
Explained to Shaun and Ryan where Samantha was
Joined Shaun and Ryan's Quest
Gassed Shaun, Ryan and Samantha
Escaped in The Dark Lord's Helicopter
Mr Ayre
Mr Ayre
Mr Ayre
Mr Ayre
Mr Ayre

Guy Goma
Unofficially Adopted by Princess Chloe and Prince George
Abandonded by Princess Chloe
Guy Goma
Guy Goma
Guy Goma
Guy Goma
Guy Goma
Guy Goma
Guy Goma

Ryan
Began the Walk to School with Shaun
Met a Young Squire Named John
New Quest
(Save Princess Chloe)
Hid From Dean and James, Servants of The Dark Lord
Met Quinn in the Gutter
Arrived at Kinglsey
Rescued Kaye
Attacked by Quintesentially Quinn
Found Princess Chloe
Rescued Princess Chloe
Ryan
New Quest
(Save Samantha)
Arrived at the School
Met Mr Ayre
Attacked by Denis
Gassed by Mr Ayre
Saved by Kaye
Ryan
Became Prime Minister of the UK
Aliya Mustafina
In a Relationship with Gordon Brown
Kicked The Dark Lord in the Face
Killed The Dark Lord with Samantha's Gun
Fell in Love with Samantha
Engaged to Samantha
Moved to St Petersburg
Aliya Mustafina
Flew to China for a Gymnastics Tournament
Met Samantha in China
Fought with Everyone
Cut out Kieran's Heart and Threw it Across the Restaurant
Locked Tomasz in the Freezer
Threw Ben in the Path of a Truck
Escaped with Samantha
Aliya Mustafina
Fled to Greenland with Samantha
New Quest
(Kill Shaun)
Flew to the School
Attacked Chloe
Kidnapped Chloe
Aliya Mustafina
Told Chloe they plan to use her as bait to kidnap John
Travelled to Bideford to Kidnap John
Joined the Quest to Save Princess Chloe
Met Tinky Winky
Arrived at the Gnome Reserve
Attacked by Gnomes
Aliya Mustafina
Accidentally Set Fire to the House

John
Explained to Shaun and Ryan that Chloe was Missing
New Quest
(Save Princess Chloe)
Hid From Dean and James, Servants of The Dark Lord
Met Quinn in the Gutter
Arrived at Kinglsey
Rescued Kaye
Attacked by Quintesentially Quinn
Stabbed in the Arm by Quintesentially Quinn
Told Shaun and Ryan to Go on without Him
Death by Bleeding Arm
(Quintessentially Quinn)
John
John
John
Brought Back to Life by The Hooded Woman
Killed a Vicar for No Apparent Reason
Arrived at School
Killed Flaxywaxy
Met Faye
Heartbroken at the Loss of his Friends
Met Noo-Noo and Felicity
New Quest
(Kill Samantha)
Flew to Moscow on Noo-Noo
Saw Samantha
Flew to China on Noo-Noo
Flirted Intensively with Faye
Did... Things With Faye
Collected Pieces of Noo-Noo
Fought with Everyone
Came in on a Parabola
John
Moved in with Shaun
Kidnapped
(Mr Gray)
Taken to the Roof of the School
John
New Quest
(Save Princess Chloe)
Fought with Noo-Noo and Destroyed Shaun's Kitchen
Prepared to be Kidnapped in Order to Save Chloe
Suddenly Turned Evil and Kidnapped Chloe
Drove Away on Noo-Noo with Chloe
Cut Chloe's Hair to Make her Look Like Faye
Attended His and Chloe's Faye's Wedding
Escaped into the Forest
John
Cut Off and Stole Henry Hoover's Sucker
Repaired Noo-Noo

The Dark Lord
(Dave Daveson)
Kidnapped Princess Chloe
Fought Shaun
Death by Sword
(Shaun)
Chris
Met Samantha on the Bus to Bideford
Shot the Bus Driver Dead
Revealed to be The Dark Lord
The Dark Lord
(Dave Daveson)
Returned From the Darkest Depths of Hell
Kidnapped Samantha to Get Revenge on Shaun
Instructed Mr Ayre to Gas Shaun, Ryan and Samantha
Escaped in His Helicopter with the Science Department
Shrek
Met Samantha
Did Unspeakable Things with Samantha
Landed in Moscow, Russia
Landed on a Bus and Killed Multiple People
Killed Gordon Brown
Revealed to be The Dark Lord
The Dark Lord
(Dave Daveson)
Killed Shaun
Hit Samantha and Knocked Her Over
Death by Gun
(Aliya Mustafina)
The Dark Lord
(Dave Daveson)
Revived by The Hooded Woman
Killed Felicity and Rebecca
Snapped The Hooded Woman's Neck
Death by Own Grenade
(Tango)
The Dark Lord
(Dave Daveson)
The Dark Lord
(Dave Daveson)
The Dark Lord
(Dave Daveson)
Gordon Brown
Married Samantha
Left Samantha for Aliya Mustafina
Moved to Moscow, Russia
Death by Being Squished
(Shrek)
Faye
Met John
Explained to John what Happened While he was Dead
Met Noo-Noo and Felicity
New Quest
(Kill Samantha)
Flew to Moscow on Noo-Noo
Saw Samantha
Flew to China on Noo-Noo
Did... Things With John
Fought with Everyone
Death by Hot Oven
(Shaun)
Mr Hensby
Offered Sam and Aliya £100,000 to Help Kill Shaun
Flew to the School
Death by Sucker
(Noo-Noo)
Mike
Moved in with Shaun and John
Played Johnny Cash on his iPad
Joined the Quest to Save Princess Chloe
Met Tinky Winky
Arrived at the Gnome Reserve
Attacked by Gnomes
Death by Gnome
(Torn Apart. Ouch.)

Tony
Born to Samantha and Gordon Brown
Moved to Moscow, Russia with Gordon Brown
Moved to St Petersburg
Tony
Abandonded by Samantha
Tony
Tony
Tony

Phil
Born to Samantha and Gordon Brown
Moved to Moscow, Russia with Gordon Brown
Moved to St Petersburg
Phil
Abandonded by Samantha
Phil
Phil
Phil

Noo-Noo
Joined John and Faye's Group
New Quest
(Kill Samantha)
Flew John, Faye and Felicity to Moscow
Saw Samantha
Flew John, Faye and Felicity to China
Death by Bus
(Whoops)
Noo-Noo
Rebuilt by John
Killed Mr Gray
Killed Mr Hensby
Noo-Noo
Ate John's Pizza
Fought with John and Destroyed Shaun's Kitchen
Helped John Kidnap Chloe
Drove John Away with Chloe
Had His Sucker Ripped Off by Tinky Winky
Noo-Noo
Repaired by John
Death by Fire
(Samantha)

Felicity
Joined John and Faye's Group
New Quest
(Kill Samantha)
Flew to Moscow on Noo-Noo
Saw Samantha
Flew to China on Noo-Noo
Felt Awkward Listening to John and Faye
Fought with Everyone
Death by Gun
(The Dark Lord)
Mr Gray
Kidnapped John
Explained to Shaun That he had Kidnapped John
Attacked Shaun
Death by Sucker
(Noo-Noo)
Sophie
Texted Shaun and Met Up With Him
Declared her Love for Shaun
Revealed she was Pregnant with Shaun's Baby
Sophie
Moved in with Shaun

The Hooded
Woman
Killed Some Worshippers for No Reason At All
Revived Shaun and Princess Chloe
Revealed to be Vicki
Revived The Dark Lord
Death by Snapped Neck
(The Dark Lord)
Tinky Winky
Joined the Quest to Save Princess Chloe
Arrived at the Gnome Reserve
Attacked by Gnomes
Death by Gnome
(Noble Sacrifice)

Tomasz
Schafernaker
Fought with Everyone
Death by Freezer?
(Aliya Mustafina)
Tomasz
Schafernaker
Tomasz
Schafernaker
Tomasz
Schafernaker